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I Am Still So Deeply In Love With Him

I met this guy during my best gf's birthday. Yeah.. he do looks normal and innocent one and he is younger than me 2years. Im not sure whether is that so called 'love at first sight' cause basically I dont really trust on these kind of things anymore as in I failed in few relationships before because of being too rush for involving myself in a new relationship.

But things started when me and my gf just thought of having a 'thing' with this guy. She got me his number and I started to sms with him. We do have lots of common and for a sure thing we 'click' on with each other very soon by cyber way.

Then during one fine day, I just thought of visiting him, which is another place where 2 hours drive from my place. I drove all the way just to visit him and of course I do visit the places there. We both can chat very well, and I always feel so comfortable whenever Im with him, maybe because he do observe alot and he do remember every little single thing that we used to chat in cyber. That's really impressive! And I really paid lots of effort for remembering all his stuff and even still keeping some of his sms which sounds so sweet to me.

Im always so clear with myself that I've already been over the limit for being a friend to him. And things screwed up when suddenly he told me that he actually attached. My heart was totally broken. I thought of giving up on him and just to mantain as a 'friend' position. But words always speak louder than action, its not easy to do so when the feelings been already hiding there deep inside my heart for over year.

When during his birthday, I even tried my best to find the nicest present for him that he always dream of. I never try to do all these to my past relationships but yet for him, Im just not sure why Im doing all these for someone who is actually impossible to be with me?

Its already been 1 year plus and yet we are still sms-ing each other eventhough we are far apart. And I do still always pay a visit when Im really so desperate to see him.

I have tried so hard to give up on him and wanted to start on a new relationship, to a guy who is really loyal to me since ever past 8 months ago. But I guess my feelings for him still not as deep as my ever dream guy. Too bad for him, and yet I know it should not be solved just like this. Its just so unfair for him. I always feel that myself so helpless and always so poor for handling my own case, eventhough I can always be the best counsellor for all my friends, for being the 'great' girl and cool girl out there.

Its suffering but yet still hoping that miracles may happen. It sounds stupid, isnt it?

Submitted By - Shino

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